Creation Process, Feelings, Growth, Life, Success

Process or Product?

What is more important to you; the learning process, enjoying the moment, the movement, the relationship, experiencing the event itself…OR seeing and feeling the manifested product from your choices and actions?

Anything manifested in physical is fleeting, temporary, like a cloud that will eventually evaporate like your body at the end of your life.  We all really need to think about this when we start coveting something.  Do you really have to have it or do you need something else that’s inside you?

The other side of the coin are the experiences we have, what we learn about others and ourselves.  Now, in this scenario, there are no mistakes.  Everything we go through has a learning curve or we are doing it for the adventure, to see what it feels like.  There is the possibility that we will feel things emotionally or physically that we have never experienced before.  The experience is not fleeting because it affects your spirit.  It doesn’t matter if the experiences feel good or bad because both are temporary.  This too shall pass!

If you believe in the soul and eternity, then you’ll want to go in this direction.  No one can take your memories and experiences away from you.  While it’s vital for everyone on the planet to have food, water, air, and a roof over their head, what we need most beyond that is human companionship, adventures, and learning.

It would be a mistake to size up your success based on “stuff”, tangible this and that for it will evaporate and mean little to nothing in the end.

Feelings, female, Life, Society

Rear View Mirror

I was looking straight ahead, as usual, driving my car.

I very rarely look at the car behind me in my rear view mirror.

For some reason, this time I did.

She was alone in her car with sunglasses on.  I tried not to stare because somehow, I could tell she was upset.

I must have had my empathic radar on again because she looked normal for ten seconds.

I kept glancing back though.

Ok, now she was crying very hard.

I could tell by the shape of her lips as she was trying to control herself and wiping under her eyes beneath the sunglasses.

So many questions and pictures went through my mind.

Did she just get a call from the hospital that her son had gotten into a car accident?

Did one of her parents just die?

Then she started hitting the passenger seat and crying while we sat at the red light.

Being the kind of person I am, I wished I could let her know I wanted to reach out to her somehow.

When she got angry and hit the seat, that caused me to think her husband either asked for a divorce, she caught him with another woman, or her boyfriend text broke up with her.

Then the light turned green.

I wondered all of that, seeing something I’ve never seen before all in a space of forty five seconds.

I hope she’s ok but I’ll  never know.

blog, bloggers, Blogging, Body, Dating, Feelings, female, friendship, Life, Love, marriage, Mating, men, Nature, Prose, Relationships, sex, Time, Women, Writers, writing

Oblivion

woman-with-orbs

Digital Artist Sandra Bauser



Time fades into oblivion

One memory, one vision of you and I feel whole again.

I remember your voice, your smell, the feel of you next to me.

In time, it was so long ago, yet to my mind, it was yesterday.

My love for you is as natural as my heartbeat.

Beliefs, blurred lines, Consciousness, death, Feminism, Healing, Life, Love, men, Relationships, Women

Sad and Sorry…Pivoted

I was just, in the flow of things, feeling sad and sorry today thinking about the fact that we are heading into the Memorial Day weekend and I am mate-less because he died March 13th.  That could make you feel sorry for me in and of itself, especially since he was my twin flame.  But that is leveling itself out now that we’re in May in Michigan.

Michael, my mate, who was going to be my fiance, is still with me.  Ashes scattered in the garden, we are absolutely, telepathically connected.  He’s with me all the time, still learning on the other side, we continue to teach each other, and he’s trying to earn his wings and climb the spiritual ladder.  So, that’s all good, but that’s not the theme here.

So, I was feeling very down today, until my patient came to get her medical massage and asked how I was.  Essentially I said, “Meh” (I didn’t precisely say that) and she asked me why.  I told her I miss Michael and we always had great fun at the holiday, shopping, cooking out, blah, blah, blah, all the traditional things. I’m not marching from grave to grave this year with flowers due to the many people around me that have died this year.

She counters and says, “I’m married and have a big family and I just want to be by myself.  I don’t want to do any gatherings!  You’re lucky!”  She’s the third woman in the last week who has said she wants to be alone!  When patients walk into my office to get a medical massage, they always tell me the truth about how they feel.

I wonder what is going on?  Other women are telling me that men they know are dying suddenly and they’ve been to too many funerals.  For real.  Guys…you may want to put your best foot forward these days before the Light sucks you into it’s eternal vortex.  Because lately, on this planet, we women like to be alone.  If you’re not here to help and to love…well…

I’m not wishing it!  I’m just observing what’s going on.

 

 

 

blog, bloggers, Blogging, Consciousness, Ego, family, Growth, Healing, Life, Relationships, Scapegoating, Self-care

Moving from Ego to Heart/Mind

Expansion-Paige Bradley

Sculptor, Paige Bradley

Can you remember the time in your life when you pivoted from making life decisions based on ego to making life decisions from your Heart and Mind?  I can.

As a young person, from 18 to about 36 years old (when I had my son), I’d have to say I operated mostly from ego and I paid a personal price for it.  I was not mindful of my body, I pursued a college degree because I listened to what the media and the world said about the status increase that a degree would bring (it didn’t).  I reacted and rebelled against my family whose values I absolutely did not and do not agree with.  I spoke my mind without considering the consequences before I did. I got married to my son’s father because my sister thought it was a good idea.  Oh my.  I pursued a particular degree path because my ex-husband suggested it when that was what he wanted, not me.  I let these people project through me because, I didn’t care that much then.

It was all just an adventure to me;  no big deal.  I even half knew they were doing it. But because I was such a free spirit, I knew they wouldn’t win.  I knew that no one was ever really going to get “most of me”. They could just have some of me for a wild ride.  You sort of lull yourself into this idea that they’re doing “your work” “for you”. Ahhhhh. There’s the hook.  You get personally lazy at directing your life.  There is a very steep price to pay for that.

In short, because I listened to and cared more about and resented what others and my family said and what they thought of me, there was suffering.  Meaning, I caused my own suffering by being “out of alignment” with what I really wanted from deep inside myself.  I resented the fact that “my loving family” didn’t see me, didn’t care to see me, and were busier projecting their own unresolved ego issues onto me than taking responsibility for healing themselves and turning their lives around so they could be a genuine support.

This is how the scapegoat thing happens in families.  The strong one, the most intelligent one, the bravest one is put through the freaking wringer by the weak ones to serve as some kind of support or rescuer for them? Not!  It’s not going to happen to me.  It does happen to many people.  It’s the foundation of our political system and has been from the beginning.  And some are just as drawn into the rescuer role for their egos as the person using them is. “Use and be used” you could call it.

What I literally observed about my life based in ego was, my body wouldn’t hold the vibration I wanted it to (I had 2 miscarriages and almost died with one), I was constantly worried about money and didn’t have enough money, I had a lot of fear and worry, I did not have confidence in the direction I was heading or had no direction, and I was frustrated that I had gifts and a strong Mind but couldn’t focus it to make my life what I wanted it to be.  I resented the emotional price and battle with the users that I had to pay to go my own way.  You see that these things are all superficial.  That’s what the ego does to you.  It gets you caught up in others drama, lack, fear, and suffering.

Sit in Love and authenticity.  Sit in your own empowerment.  We are response-abled (responsible/able to respond) in our lives. Love your body no matter what.  Do the work that floats your cork.  Don’t think about what others may say or think.  Do what you Love.  Envision abundance doing what you love.  Plan it out.  Get concrete.  Ask for help from a healer or spiritual counselor.  Don’t think for a minute that religion is going to shield you from hell and speed you to heaven.  People create hell on Earth by sitting in ego, and religionists get rich from the promise of forgiveness and heaven.  Your karma for copping out on Love is real.  I completely turned my life around by going out on a limb and leaving my ego behind and surrendering to Love. My karma has turned to dharma because I worked at it.  No one can pull me back in.   The Universe has my back.