death, Esperanza Spalding, Jazz singers, Love, Music, Spirituality, Synchronicity, Time

Esperanza Spalding

 

This is a gorgeous song written and performed by Esperanza.  Have a listen.

I was taking a break tonight from reading my new book, “Synchronicity”, decided to go pick up a snack.  I was in the dark car and felt like playing with serendipity and not actually “choose” the CD there in the dark.  I reached for whatever and popped this in.  I skipped forward, driving along, and it landed on this song that I hadn’t listened to for a year and a half.

I got as far as the next street and realized the last time I listened to this was when my mate Michael was alive, a year ago.  He was on life support a year ago from March 2nd-March 13th, 2016 for pneumonia.

We had planned on getting married, totally enjoyed each others company, never fought (seriously), laughed all the time and were in love.  Sure there were a few hitches but not many!  We were both convinced we were twin flames; two peas in a pod.

Yeah, that pod exploded when Michael died within fifteen minutes of walking out my front door.  I got him to the ER in a matter of 10 minutes, he got wheeled into the ER, passed out and stopped breathing five minutes later.  He never regained consciousness.  His lungs gave out that quickly.  The rest of the story is in the book I wrote about the synchronicity in my life, not all around death of course.

As I listened to this song, I remembered back to all the thoughts and feelings I had planning my future with Michael, now gone.  But I never really heard or processed the part about “the dream” because when I knew Michael I couldn’t relate to it.  I always wondered about the meaning though.  Now I know the meaning.

They say if you die in a dream, you die in real life.

Well I just died in your arms, lost in your eyes.

And I know this must be a dream, cause I feel I could fly to heaven.

They say if you live in a dream you’re hopelessly lost.

But this ain’t a silly ole’dream, our paths have crossed

And maybe I’m hopelessly lost but somehow I managed to find…

heaven.

Where was I, feeling this song and these words tonight?  With him or here in my life on Earth?   Michael did find “heaven”.  I’m still here. but Michael is still with me.  I can feel it when he’s here, so part of “the other dimension” is with me.

I’m convinced that our minds and hearts can be aware of other dimensions no matter where we are.  Tonight it was in my face.  My mind literally could feel being between dimensions.  Synchronicity adjusts time and takes us wherever our minds want to be.

Just now, I heard him say, “I love you baby”.

 

 

Beliefs, blurred lines, Consciousness, death, Feminism, Healing, Life, Love, men, Relationships, Women

Sad and Sorry…Pivoted

I was just, in the flow of things, feeling sad and sorry today thinking about the fact that we are heading into the Memorial Day weekend and I am mate-less because he died March 13th.  That could make you feel sorry for me in and of itself, especially since he was my twin flame.  But that is leveling itself out now that we’re in May in Michigan.

Michael, my mate, who was going to be my fiance, is still with me.  Ashes scattered in the garden, we are absolutely, telepathically connected.  He’s with me all the time, still learning on the other side, we continue to teach each other, and he’s trying to earn his wings and climb the spiritual ladder.  So, that’s all good, but that’s not the theme here.

So, I was feeling very down today, until my patient came to get her medical massage and asked how I was.  Essentially I said, “Meh” (I didn’t precisely say that) and she asked me why.  I told her I miss Michael and we always had great fun at the holiday, shopping, cooking out, blah, blah, blah, all the traditional things. I’m not marching from grave to grave this year with flowers due to the many people around me that have died this year.

She counters and says, “I’m married and have a big family and I just want to be by myself.  I don’t want to do any gatherings!  You’re lucky!”  She’s the third woman in the last week who has said she wants to be alone!  When patients walk into my office to get a medical massage, they always tell me the truth about how they feel.

I wonder what is going on?  Other women are telling me that men they know are dying suddenly and they’ve been to too many funerals.  For real.  Guys…you may want to put your best foot forward these days before the Light sucks you into it’s eternal vortex.  Because lately, on this planet, we women like to be alone.  If you’re not here to help and to love…well…

I’m not wishing it!  I’m just observing what’s going on.